The Paralysis of Indecision
Newsletter #71
Overcoming Perfectionism Despite Overthinking
For the past several weeks I have been stuck in a cycle of “should I/shouldn’t I” followed by “if I do, when should I” indecision. And it felt yucky. I’d start off the day thinking that I knew what I would do, but by the evening I had changed my mind. Then a few days later some other wrinkle crept into my brain that made me re-think everything. Back and forth from feeling sure to unsure. How incredibly debilitating.
When I stopped to think more about it, I realized two things. The first was that when I was younger, I was very indecisive. I think back then, it stemmed from both overthinking (admittedly I still do this) as well as perfectionism (thankfully I’ve put that in my past). Living with the anxiety of indecision cast a cloud over me. I’m seriously grateful that I have not felt indecisive in a really long time.
The second thing I realized was that I had forgotten about a tip I had read in Greg McKeown's book ESSENTIALISM. He says, “If it isn’t a clear yes, then it’s a clear no.” This concept has helped me a lot in the past few years. I’ve been able to focus better on what I want to spend my time doing. Keeping this in mind gives me confidence in making choices quickly as long as I know what my main priorities are.
I did finally make a firm decision. But boy was it frustrating until then. I’m not sure why I found myself in that endless circular mind game for as long as I did. But now that I’ve reflected on it, I hope I’ll remember the next time I may be heading toward the land of indecisive paralysis that “if it isn’t a clear yes, then it’s a clear no.”
Do you have any life mantras that help you?
Book Report: ÁNH’S NEW WORD, A STORY ABOUT LEARNING A NEW LANGUAGE
Written by Hanh Bui
Illustrated by Bao Luu
What an endearing story about how a young child living in a refugee camp struggles to speak and learns to have courage. I love how the author Hanh infuses such heartfelt emotion in each scene in a way that children can so easily relate to. Ánh’s worries, fears of making a mistake, and frustration when her school experience from Vietnam contrasts strikingly with her classroom in the United States are all prominent in the story arc. The use of similes clearly reference an Asian perspective. She relies on the encouragement and understanding of her grandmother Bà Nôi and the patience and care of her teacher Miss Mary Ellen. The illustrator Bao takes care to show the story with full art that focuses on the characters while also giving enough careful details in the setting that helps with comprehension. One of my favorite parts of the book is the Author’s Note where we learn about the real life experience of Hanh and her beloved teacher Miss Marilou that made an impactful story even more meaningful.
Themes: courage, love and acceptance, immigration, refugees, perseverance, determination
Discussion Ideas:
How does Ánh’s Bà Nôi give her the support and courage she needs?
How can the lessons you’ve learned from Ánh’s experience help you when you’re learning something brand new?
Mentor Text For:
show, don’t tell
making inferences
similes
punctuation in dialogue
Link to Teacher Resources: One Page Resource Poster that includes a teaching slide deck, worksheets on sequencing, making connections, identifying feelings, vocabulary, SEL, drawing, word scramble, word search, comprehension tic-tac-toe, maze, puzzle, and simile!
Buy the book!
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Weekly Progress Report
This is a section for “stuff I did” that relates to my writing career. I believe in celebrating all wins, big and small alike.
met with the SF/South Regional Team
added bio to my SCBWI member page
made it to Mrs. Dalloway’s for the GAYSIANS book launch by Mike Curato in conversation with Randy Ribay
celebrated the third book in the AVA LIN series called SUPER-DUPER HAPPY with Vicky Fang at Linden Tree Books
Sending you courage and grace in all you choose to do,
Susan